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July 21, 2012 (Morning)

Exercise Type: Run

Comments:
ran at the towpath this morning with a pretty larger than normal group. i told justin cody and mizer to meet me there, but got bonus additions of seth, adunn and will cutler and evan reed who went to jackson. it was a pretty good group. was possibly going to go long today, but justin said he's going 15 tomorrow, but at 8 AM... we'll see. i'll probably go. anyway we headed out and it was a pretty good run. had lots to catch up with justin. cody had more to bug me about with my (barely existant) social life. haha. we had some real good talks about running this fall too. the run was real smooth, but we kind of spread out as the run went on, and the last 2 miles were just cody justin seth and me. and in traditional towpath fashion, we stepped up the last mile, and crushed the last bit, particularly justin and I on the last 200.

running with justin always gets me fired up. he replaced nick since he doesn't run anymore. we're "on paper rivals" as he put it. he's pretty much always been better than me, but as of late i'm on the upswing. i'm only a few seconds off him in anything longer than the mile. occasionally this fired up turns into an out of control thing. the last 200 of our run falls into the possibly out of control category. i haven't finished anything that hard in a long time. it was pretty much a straight up 200 because i wasnt tired at all from any of the rest of the run. he beat me by a very small margin. i let him gain 3 or 4 steps, thinking i could get him back but finished maybe a half step behind. it was great. the best loss of my life. i feel like me again! smiling all out of breath. i really can't remember the last time i felt this good! i feel so much better after this run. despite how justin beat me i knew when we went, that i can beat anyone i want to, or make it damn close. just like the old days. not sure what triggered it. maybe it was the conversations of the run, me talking way too much shit to justin about how i finally had a pr faster than him for a week during track this year. knowing i still have that cocky kid hiding inside somewhere. thats probably the biggest difference in me now from high school. these guys just reminded me i still had it. and i'm going to change back. i feel like a loser looking back at high school like it was my prime. i used to be so confident in myself, especially when anything mattered, like finishing an easy run hard! but seriously my confidence just hasnt been there in a long time. i don't know what changed in me, i can't explain it, but i know i'm better than that kind of attitude. its just that right amount of confidence, not an "i'm better than everyone even though i'm not" kind of confidence, its just knowing what i can do. i can be much better than i've been. i want to be able to say that i'm proud of a cross season from college. i just can't keep looking back at 3 years ago. i had my track moments this year, now its time for cross. last mile was 5:28. negative split after a 35:00ish way out. last 200 had to be like, 17 or 18 seconds max though. at least world record pace ;)