View Workout (Joe Uhan)
Yoga Workshop...
January 18, 2014 (Morning)
Exercise Type: Other
Comments:
Slept in pretty good this AM (7? 8?), then loaved around, having coffee, before it was time for the Yoga Workshop at 11AM. It's a technique class going over the fundamentals of several poses. I went, along with her dad and bro, so it was the three of us stiff guys in the back row. It was fun and very worthwhile to hone in on the poses.
It was weird, though: I was SUPZ out of breath, even going through minor poses. The air here has been mega-stangant (zero movement) all week and it's weighing on me. Felt like I needed my inhalar.
After that, we parted ways to get errands done. I returned my stupid air dehumidifier ($210 which didn't do much) and some shit at Target, then mailed some cards to my bro/his GF. We ate dinner at her place (more of last night's chili for me!), then went out.
I was feeling a little weird, existentially, this morning. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed (or close to it) about the things I feel I need to do, and I feel like I can fall into this cycle of "feeling stressed, not doing enough, feeling more stressed...".
So I began to think about that notion of serving others. And I came up with three key questions:
1.) Who AM I?
In other words, what important roles do I fulfill during my day?
2.) What does the (my) world need from me today?
Using those roles, what do I need to do to fulfill them, to serve others? This can be a source of anxiety, but when you outline only what you need to do, it's not so hard.
3.) What do *I* need from the (my) world?
You can't always just give. You also need to be filled. So what are the things I need today to feel OK or good?
I thought about that a lot. I also thought about how that related to Chels. I recalled that "marriage" blog post and how it talked about the "Ten Things You Need to Feel Loved".
So...after dinner, I told Chels I had some "activities" for us, so we went to a bar/restaurant near my place that I'd never been, for cocktails. I busted out the pen and paper and we went to work.
It was a GREAT exercise: I felt like I helped me really streamline what I need to do, day-to-day, and the really important things I need to do (as brother, son, friend, partner, professional) versus the junk, as well as the (few?) things I need to be happy. Moreover, it was great to hear those things about Chels, because I know how much she struggles to find balance in her day.
But the best was the "love list". What we did was make a list for ourselves, then for the other! ("WITH za other and AGAINST za other!")
So I listed mine, then she listed the things she thought I needed, and vice versa. The way I saw it, there's no wrong answer: while there was a lot of overlap (60%?), she and I listed things about the other that we didn't realize, but ultimately agreed, that we needed. It was a terrific exercise.
That really spurred a lot of conversation about life roles, professional goals, and the future. It was phenomenal! Time just blew by.
We could've just ended there but we were both pretty energized, and I wanted to have some fun. So, for the first time in a LONG while, we went to the Red Lion for karaoke. The Red Lion is being torn down in like 2 weeks, so this would be our last shot at going, the site of our first "Date" back in 8/2012.
We got there and it was PACKED. Like, JAMMED, like I've never seen it. Tons of great singers, too, so it was a bit intimidating. Chels wanted something new, too - no BSB stand-by.
It was time to step-up.
Earlier in the day, on Pandora Mariah Carey's "Always be my Baby" came on, and I told her how I used to sing it to myself in my old '87 Grand Am back in HS ('95-96 when it came out).
I thought really hard about it, even researching the internet about different boy band songs to do instead. But I knew doing this would be epic. So I did it.
We had to wait maybe 30min for me to be picked, with LOTS of good singers ahead of me. I drank about 3/4 a beer before being called up. It was go time.
The worst part of the song is the beginning: it's all "Doo-doo-DOO-doo-DOO-duh-da!"s and supz awkward.
But I got over it, and fuck, man, it was just like I was back in the Grand Am in the spring of '96! I rocked it pretty good, and the crowd LOVED IT.
The best part of the song is the bridge. And in classic fashion, I left the stage and approached Chels and sang:
"I know that you'll be back boy
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder
I know that you'll be right back baby
Oh baby believe me it's only a matter of TIIIIIIIIIME!"
It was phenomenal! The end was a little awkward, but by then, it was done. I rocked it.
The DJ was impressed too, saying "That guy has BIG BALLZ!" HA!
Got back to Chels and she kissed me, like VIOLENTLY. It was terrific, and so worth that risk.
We took off after that (it would've taken til 2AM to sing another). Once home? I was "richly rewarded". B-)
Today was a classic example - perhaps amplified - of the roles I think we as men need to play in women's lives:
- be willing to learn and do things out of your comfort zone (yoga, singing)
- nurture, yet challenge
- communicate
- be a confident "lover"
Good stuff. B-)
That's multi-dimensional love