View Workout (Joe Uhan)
EMELIA
March 27, 2014 (Morning)
Exercise Type: Other
Comments:
Got to Sidelines AFTER 6 (when we agreed to 5:30). But thankfully there were four of them there, INCLUDING Emelia.
Right when I walked in, they were being helped by Whitney, who I knew from Max's! Side note: I've had a TON more "indicators of interest" from Whitney in our run-ins the past couple months....ever since she saw me with Chels at Max's in January! Again, SOCIAL PROOF is super-powerful!
I used this social proof to my advantage, joking with Whit and the group when I showed up (using SP to show Emelia that I'm friendly/likeable with Whit).
Had a great time socializing with the group. Trina and Emelia were on one side of the booth with Coop and Warren on the other. I obviously sat with the guys (non-flirt flirt), but was situated across the booth from Emelia. I engaged with the whole group, without chatting too much with Emelia. But when the convo went from work chat (not fun) to randomly talking about 9-11 conspiracies (REALLY not fun), I turned to Emelia and engaged her: about her job and other things.
Once the 9-11 talk dissipated, I directed a "fun" question to the entire group, "What's the worst thing a guy can do on a first date?" I chose that question for two reasons: one, because it's a fun question and ripe for ripping on the people (namely women) who mention particularly gross things, and two, I wanted to point out that I was now single (which I wasn't sure Emelia - or the coworkers present - were aware of). That spurred some lively banter: the most entertaining coming from the older ladies - Trina and Natalia, who showed up around that time. I pushed Emelia to contribute, but she didn't have anything, and noted that she's "only dated, like, one guy" (SERZ? Hmmm...).
Around this time, Emelia asked me how I knew Whitney, and I told her I knew her from Max's.
"You go to MAX'S??"
"Yeah, of course, I love Max's!"
"Do you know SHAUNA??"
"Yeah!"
Turns out, both Shauna and Josie (who I'm certain BGD remembers) are close friends of hers, and are going to be her roommates in Portland this summer!
Holy. Shit!
Serious social proof opportunity. I told her about how I knew them, and talked about meeting Josie just after "my Josie" was born, and how she's from Meadow Vista, where Gordy lives. This sent me into a Western States History talk, which is always good. I asked Em about Shauna (who's also a runner, and oft-injured). Emelia texted Josie to ask about me, and if she knew who I was: which of course, she did, as both her and Shauna were wowed by my "Five questions" back in August (http://running-log.com/workouts/2047034?athleteid=45). I told Emelia that I had "a quiz" for her, that both Shauna/Josie "failed" - and that I was "saving it for later".
The beers were flowing good, and I was worried - for myself and Emelia - that we might get tanked, so I ordered some apps along with more pitchers. It was a genuinely fun time: cool to get to know (especially my older, female) coworkers.
In Sidelines they have "gigantic Jenga", made from foot-long 2x4s that stacks about 2.5 feet high at the start. Emelia saw it and mentioned it a couple times, so, around 8ish, when I could tell things were beginning to wind down with the others, I asked Emelia to play. So she I and I headed to the front of the bar.
Our game lasted close to a HOUR! It was an epic battle, with lots of fun and TONS of flirting. We were playfully touching each other A LOT - simply enormous IOIs! It was SO on.
By mid-game, all but Cooper left for home. Coop wanted to see us finish, but it took 'til nearly 9PM! We had that sonofabitch stacked about 6' in the air before it fell ON Emelia, which was pretty funny. Coop left, and that left Emelia to ourselves, with a half pitcher of beer to finish.
I knew for sure I wanted to relocate, so - with the enticement of "the quiz" and "a couple more games", we relocated to The Granary, a restaurant/bar near my place (also key). I remembered that it was "rap night" at Granary, so we were both very excited. I drove. :)
Once at the Granary, we went down to its dark-but-classy-cool bottom floor, where they have these "nook" booths, built-in like caves into the sidewalls of the room. We picked one with a little table and nestled in for a drink, and some games.
We played the "5 questions" game, where she lost, but made it to question 5 (FYI - for the record, only Sara has gotten this quiz right!). Then we played The Cube game, which I fucking LOVE. It's SO fun, SO interesting, and always creates an emotional connection (Chels was *highly-responsive* to these games, and I think they were pivotal to establishing our early connection in November/December).
During the Cube drawing analysis, I was more hands-on with Emelia - building a little more connection. By the time we were done with that, she was flat-out staring at me: absolutely wanting me to kiss her, no doubt.
I hesitated only slightly, going for the "Three questions"/core values question. She picked running, which was really cool. I talked about how Western States is my "one thing I would do", and how that relates to my values (challenge, nature/solitude, but also community) and noted that she "has to see my silver buckles!", which was my excuse to stop at my place.
But before that, it was time to shift gears. I looked at her, and she was giving me The Stare. In game-life fashion, I asked, "You want to kiss me, don't you?"
I can't even REMEMBER the answer - or if there was even one - but we kissed. DAMN. She went for it, open-mouthed. We kissed a couple times, before I said, "Let's get out of here"
The Granary closes at 10, so we left and made the short trip three blocks to my place. Once inside, she checked out some of my pics, and I put on some tunes. My Western States paraphernalia was conveniently located upstairs, so we headed up there, where I showed her my belt buckles and other stuff.
Not..really sure what happened after that, but...it was ON. DAMN!
I won't go into specific details, other than:
- It was absolutely terrific and gratifying. At one point, she told me, "You'e SO fucking hot!" YES. My psyche was validated.
- It was an interesting contrast from Chelsea. Emelia KNEW what she likes and wanted, and she SHOWED ME. She *put my hands* where she wanted them, and DID what she wanted to do. Gosh, that was so refreshing - rather than constantly dealing with repression and a fundamental inability to ask or fight for what you want, which characterizes Chelsea.
- It really was shocking how assertive she was, and how much SHE enjoyed it. Talking about our attraction to one another (which always generating MORE attraction at the time), she said, "I wish we'd done this a long time ago!". It is clear that she really wanted this just as much (if not more so) than, me, so there was and is zero guilt on my part. Physical intimacy is a fundamental human need, and if she and I can exchange that safely and authentically, than I think it's healthy. And I will continue to defend the "pick up strategies" because they are tools to connect and create trust - the very things I failed to do consistently with Chelsea once we were a couple. That I did so quite effectively with Emelia only provided a conduit for her to express HER attraction to ME, and obviously vice-versa.
She stayed overnight, which was both great and a little hard to sleep. We "interacted" for a good hour or two...and then again when I had to get before 6AM. DAMN, SO GOOD.
We got up, I made her some tea (she demurred at the idea of six eggs and bacon), and then I drove her to her car. I made strong efforts to make her feel safe and valued, including hugging and kissing her when we bid goodbye.
Emelia is pretty awesome. Is there a future there, could I "see myself" with her? I dunno. Probably not, but fuck it - I thought I was going to MARRY Chelsea a month ago! We had a great interaction, and I'm grateful for that.
She texted me later in the morning, saying, "Let's have a replay of last night, soon!". B-)
GOOD NIGHT. Extremely grateful for that exchange of intimacy, no doubt. I really needed it.