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easy around Rocklin; Tahoe City with KC

June 30, 2014 (Morning)

Exercise Type: Run

Weather: 80 by like 7ish? HOT

Comments:
Slept pretty good - probably my best sleep in a week. BGD took off, and I went for a run just after he left.

Felt STIFF! Jeez! Ran toward Springview, thinking I'd maybe do some park loops, but decided to run toward Clover Valley. Turned around just after 2 miles.

HR started low, but quickly spiked, no doubt due to fatigue and building heat. Did 5 or so strides outside the house after the run - stiff and awkward!

After that, I cleaned up, packed up, and headed up the hill once more!

I wasn't sure how it was going to go, or what, exactly might happen. I just wanted the opportunity to *connect*. But I won't lie, the thought of kissing her crossed my mind, but I didn't fret about it. I would "flow" and see what happened.

I rolled into Tahoe City on a beautiful morning around 9:45. Kaci met me outside, alone(!!). She looked great, and was even sporting eye-liner and this almost-pink lipstick that, while borderline outrageous, fit her pixie-ness perfectly. She looked damn great for having just finished a hundred miles. We hugged hello in the parking lot and, while I still had my arm around her, she SHOT a freaking "champagne bottle firework" at me! "There's your party favor!" HA! SERZ?? Wow, classic. After I jumped and squealed like a girl, she shot another one at me! Wow.

I LIKE this girl. A LOT.

Her hotel was on the main strip in TC, so we walked east down the road a bit 'til I found a coffee place, then we crossed over to the lakeside. After picking up a coffee (and her a water bottle with Crystal Light mixed in), we walked down toward the lakeshore, then got on the bike path and walked west.

There was a lot of small talk, and a good amount of playful joking, as we loped down the path. We told stories about...stuff, a lot of which I can't remember. It just FELT GOOD to be with her, to be out of the craziness of a race, and to be fully present.

We crossed what looked to be the headwaters of the Truckee River, and saw an area across the mouth with some park benches, so we headed there. After milling around a bit, snapping a few pics, we walked some more, but eventually settled down beside the lake on a picnic table, in the shade.

We didn't sit too close, at first, but - between watching the random folks and families in the vicinity - began talking. I brought up her question: "Why are you still single?", and, of course, she made me go first. I told her what Sam and I talked about: how I treated my relationship - with Chels, but really with every important woman - like I did, WS '13: forcing it, trying too hard, and trying to fill "this hole" in me. I talked about my dad, and she nodded with the understanding that only she and few others could.

She then told me her part. There was no specific story - though I could feel there was heartbreak there - but only said that "It's really hard for me to trust people, and to let them in". I got that, I understood.

I put my arm around her, then, and told her, simply, "I like you". I explained why: how warm, positive, and giving she is, AND how I can feel that she is wounded. I explained what this meant - how I am a fixer and caregiver, and that *I*, too, am wounded.

It wasn't long 'til she "sidled up" beside me, in my arms, cradling her tiny figure. Her arms was chilly in the shade, so I stroked them to warm her. She hand was on mine, her little thumb rubbing my hand, a minor gesture that gave me the chills.

For being so diminutive, she has a shocking amount of power over me. :-)

We sat there, for a LONG time, with long periods of silence, which was perfectly fine - just watching the water roll lazily from the lake to the river. Kids and grandparents played below us. We talked about race day, and how special - and, seemingly, fateful - it was. We smiled a lot.

It was quite clear to me, now, that I wanted to kiss her. I really wanted to kiss her on the cheek at the finish line on Saturday night, so I told her as much. And I did. She planted one on my left cheek. :-P

Then, inexplicably, she stood up and grabbed my hands! (Woah!). She drew me in for a hug, thanking me. We hugged, then I put her head in my hands. I ran my fingers through her hair a bit, then put my lips to her pink lipstick.

:-D

We sat again, her in my arms once more. The sun, now above us past noon, began to shine on our spot, so we moved to an adjacent bench for a bit longer.

In between a couple more kisses on those tiny lips and a whole lot of cuddling (and, ugh, she actually rubbed ME! So great...something that "other women" simply never did), there were a couple more important things said:

- She told me, "You have no idea how important you are to me".

WOAH. Wow, that's...that's huge. Big, big stuff. Wow.

I responded to that, and in recognition of the situation we're in - clearly having feelings for one another, yet so new and far away - with this:

- that - while I can't promise she won't get hurt - "I will do EVERYTHING in my power to protect you...and that's what Saturday was about" - this compelling drive to care for and protect her.

She smiled, and we kissed once more.

By then, it was nearing one o'clock and time to return. She fretted about Miguel waiting (which was fine, more out of her own selflessness than him, clearly, which was a good thing). So we walked back.

As we got out of the trees and onto the path, I wanted to hold her hand, but she grabbed mine, first! We walked, slowly, back toward the hotel, me holding her and occasionally pulling her close to me.

Finally, inevitably, we got back to my car. I drew her in, once again holding her head in my hands and planting a few (gosh, I love that). She feels really good in my arms.

She cracked a few bad jokes, of course, before we finally parted ways.

GOOD. STUFF. Damn, I like this girl a TON. I think back to what BGD had said about all the women he'd known who were "takers": needy (which is OK), but ultimately just too damn selfish. I told Kaci that givers are inevitably drawn toward takers, as they tend to need our help. But givers have needs, too.

Kaci is a a true giver, dare I say in the rare category as Sara, and that is SO special. She's super-cute, and her energy, spunk and understated curvaceousness (somehow chiseled within that 92-pound frame) is downright sexy. But that she's also a huge nerd that makes me laugh constantly is true gift, as well.

Very, very special, indeed.

The drive home went quickly. I thought about her a lot. So grateful for this day, and this week.